I DATED A RICH MAN WHO USED TO POOP IN MY MOUTH DURING S*X

I DATED A RICH MAN WHO USED TO POOP IN MY MOUTH DURING S*X

A Confession I Have Been Afraid to Say Out Loud

I dated a man for three years when I was still in varsity. I was young, broke, and trying to survive. He was older, powerful, and extremely rich — the kind of rich that makes people envious. At first, I thought I was lucky. He took care of me, paid for everything, and made me feel like I had stepped into another world.

But he was… strange.

There were nights when I woke up feeling sick and confused, like something had happened while I was asleep. I would find him watching me with a look that I still cannot explain. He always said I made him feel “strong,” but the way he said it made my skin crawl. There were moments I felt like he was taking something from me — something spiritual, something deep.

There were times when he would take me to a hotel,upon arrival he would make sure I get drunk. The kind of drunk that feels unusual like you've been spiked.

I would literally be light headed with a spinning head and I think I'd see him pooing inside my mouth. And when he would do that he would be moaning and groaning in great pleasure like he was getting an orgasm. I hated that so much because the next day I'd wake very sick.

When I graduated and got a job, I left him. I thought I was leaving the darkness behind. But that was just the beginning.

Fast forward to today… my life has been nothing but heartbreak. I have three kids, and all their fathers left me while I was still pregnant. Every relationship ends before it even starts. Every man disappears as if something is pushing them away from me.

And then there is the part that scares me the most — the way my body reacts during intimacy. It’s like I lose control. It’s embarrassing, painful, and it makes me feel like I’m cursed. I don’t understand it, and it feels like it started after him.

The embarassing part is that when I come in poop on myself. This has been happening since I broke up with him and it takes me back to how he would act when he was pooping in my mouth. I act exactly like him now and men don't stay.

Sometimes I feel like he left a mark on me… something I can’t see but I can feel.

I tried searching for him. No number. No social media. Even people who knew him say they haven’t seen him in years. It’s like he vanished from the earth the moment I walked away.

I finally went for a consultation because the nightmares and strange feelings were getting too much. And what I was told still makes me shake:
I wasn’t dating a rich man — I was dating a rich man’s ghost.

When they said that, everything inside me went cold. The strange nights. The way he watched me. The power he had. The way he disappeared.

Now I keep asking myself:
Was I used for something?
Did he tie my spirit to his wealth?
Is this why my life feels stuck?

I don’t know the truth yet, but I can feel something is not right with me. And maybe writing this is my first step toward freeing myself.